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storage:clown_porn

Item: VHS Tapes of Soft Core Clown Pornography

Designation: Acquisition

Storage Contact: Oscar Blonk

Number in Storage: 12

Description:

“Frotto the Clown's Badventures” is a 12 video series featuring soft core adult scenes. All actors and actresses appear to be dressed in standard clown costume, including face paint, red noses, and brightly colored clothes that quickly come off. Actors and actresses have either been painted all-white or have skin pigment deficiency.

Episodes last from fifteen minutes to two hours per video. Cassettes themselves are unmarked, though they come in a variety of solid neon colors.

Volumes include…

  1. “Circus Escape” - Frotto sleeps his way out of the circus.
  2. “The Farmer's Daughters” - (Recorded Over)
  3. “Riding the Rails” - Frotto travels by train-hopping, meets attractive hobos.
  4. “Big Top, Big City” - Frotto discovers the wonders of a modern metropolis.
  5. “Dollars to Dollops” - Frotto gets a job in a pie shop. Hijinks ensue.
  6. “Back Alley Acrobatics” - (Recorded Over)
  7. “Your Shoe Size, Sir?” - (Recorded Over)
  8. “Good Golly Miss Polly” - Frotto frees a bird woman from a cruel master.
  9. “Beach Blanket Bang-O” - Frotto and Polly go to the beach, meet evil sea captain.
  10. “Extra Sauce, Hold the Sausage” - Frotto takes a shot at delivering pizza.
  11. “Crash Coarse” - Frotto goes back to college.
  12. “The Big Finish” - (Recorded Over)

Items were obtained during the purchase of a VHS rental store to be replaced with a Burger Load. Held onto for possible use in outmoded company systems, as blank media to record over.

Reason for storage:

Any attempt to record over the tapes results in any recorded footage being corrupted. Specifically, clowns can be spotted vigorously mating in the background.

Final Order: Permanent Closed Storage.

Further Notes: Watching these recordings felt like I lost a huge slice of my life I can never get back. I'll never look at security footage the same way again.


Visitor Comments

To my knowledge, no one directed you to view these.

Ooh. Happy accident. Oscar, please contact me if you begin seeing the “corruption” you mentioned on other TV shows and movies.

Uhm… Alright.

storage/clown_porn.txt · Last modified: 2015/12/12 21:20 by slimebeast